Soothe Me, Baby.

I've just moved house, and as per usual Optus are taking their sweet ass time to get me a new modem. So no updates. I'll get back to you soon.

If You Have To Ask.

Entries have been extended til Saturday. Will be a shit tonne of fun, except for the one hundred lap motorpace, which will hurt. But not if you're just watching.

What Will Sustain Us Through The WInter?

Andy "Fyxomatosis" White, perhaps feeling the loss of the Cannonball Run, decided that he would head over to Adelaide to watch the Tour Down Under. On his bike. In four days. Now, I grew up around Western Victoria, and if there's one thing I can tell you, it's that once he leaves the volcanic plains around the Western Suburbs, he's in for a whole lot of up and down. With very little in between. He asked me if I'd be interested in riding to Hamilton with him, but after I blew up in Kinglake on Sunday the answer was clear to everybody.

Good luck and godspeed, brother.

It Was Just That The Time Was Wrong.

If I Could Walk, I'd Be A Miner.

I've been having some trouble with my hips lately, perhaps due to the aforementioned attempts to 'go harder', and as such called up Dom to make an appointment. Instead of asking me what time I was available, however, he asked me if I ever caught the bus to work along Bell St.

"Yeah, why?" I replied.
"Because I saw you walking. And mate, your walk is fucked!"

In the consequent appointment he told me that I wasn't ever locking out my knee, which means I load up the joint and throw my hips and back out. That slouchy teenage insouciance was coming back to get me. So now I have to re-learn how to walk. Which is totally fucking hard! Imagine trying to alter something you have done thousands of times a day for thirty years. Having to think consciously about something you've been able to do subconsciously all your life. Overcorrecting, in the hope that when you stop thinking about it you'll fall back into the correct gait. Looking stupid in the meantime. Looking something like this.

Master! Master!

When it comes to holiday reading, my second favourite genre of book is 'badly written auto/biography' (my first favourite is, of course, 'well written auto/biography', but let's face it, those are few and far between. Especially when it comes to cycling auto/biographies. I mean, fuck, have you read the Lance Armstrong book? That shit blows). This summer my parents generously overlooked the Cadel Evans book - perhaps sensitive to my recent defeat at his hands - and purchased for me the Anna Meares book. It is, true to form, terribly (ghost!) written, but seems to have left an impression on me nonetheless. I think I'd been getting a bit slack before Christmas - not pushing myself hard enough at training, settling for podium finishes in racing - and reading about the training that she and her peers at the AIS do has given me the inspiration to push myself even harder. Every effort, every race, every training ride. It's on.

Which Won't Actually Be A Song Song.

Good mate Campbell Townsend is in the hospital today, courtesy of a driver running a red light at 60ks an hour. His leg is apparently broken in three places. As you ride past, on your daily commute or your way to get coffee or your training run down to Beach Rd, I encourage you to yell out for him to "Do A Skid!", as an act of solidarity. It ain't much, but it will let him know that the community is with him.

He's on level seven. Yell loud.

I'm Going To Tell God.

So, you have a track bike, right? And you occasionally head down to the velodrome to roll around and take some pictures, right? Well, now it's time for you to give back to the community!

The Brunswick Track Open is on Saturday the 30th January. It has become tradition for fixed.org.au and members of the fixed gear community to sponsor races. Last year we were responsible for the "I'm A Potato" B Grade Scratch Race, and the "Buy A New Bike" A Grade Scratch Race.

This year I'm thinking the "Siq Barspinzz" Handicap, the "Don't Flame Me Bro" Keirin and the "Industrie Fixed Gear" Elimination. But this sponsorship (and their hilarious names) depends on your donations!

If you are interested, please send five, ten or even twenty bucks to paypal and I'll work it out. Should be a great evening and fully sick racing.

Cash to me in person, Paypal to ndf at undershorts dot org or

You should also come down on the day and watch! The highlight will likely be the 100 lap Henry Hill Motorpace. Folks will be dropping like flies.

Feel free to repost in all of your networks.