I'm Going To Tell God.

Last Saturday night, as the previous post mentions, I went to ShitTown. For those out of the loop, it's a fucking shitty fucking hipster bar in a stairwell next to St Jerome's in the city. At one point in the evening I found myself bemoaning the location with my friend Tash. "It's like some bar from Sex and the City that those women just had to be at the opening of." I whined. "Yes," she replied, "but full of eighteen year olds that you can't hit on because they used to be your students." Although technically, according to the letter of the law, I can hit on them, I took her point. Which isn't my point. My point is that the perfect antidote to a night in a place that features significantly in "what's hot" lists everywhere is Collapsed Toilet Vietnam.

They were playing Horse Bazaar on Wednesday night, and were alleged to be starting at 9.40. I didn't know this until 9.30, and was comfortably on the couch watching House when TJ worded me up. So I roared down St Kilda Rd, skidded into oncoming traffic on Little Lon, and made my way into the venue. CTV were just setting up. It kinda looked like all hell was breaking loose. There was gaffer tape plastered everywhere, connecting drums and amps and mic stands and - midway through the set - members of the band to the audience. There seemed to be stuff everywhere. They'd brought along their own PA, which add to the clutter, but which made perfect sense as soon as they started. When you're as deliberately loud and obnoxious as CTV, it pays to bring your own PA. I was surprised to see some other dude standing up there next to Petie Hyde, with some bamboo sticks and a metal bar. But when they started playing he joined in, whacking the sticks against the bar, then pressing the bar against his neck and screaming, the added bass and percussion pushing in and out of the wall of noise. CTV are the band I want appear out of nowhere when I'm at some shitty wedding or presentation night, to scare off everyone but the true believers. A band made up of fucking awesome musicians - whose collected ears for abrasive sound production are some of the finest around - making music that mums, trendy scenesters, authority figures and TV soundtrack scouts would fucking hate. Their sets are a little longer now, and some of the new songs are a little slower, but fuck me if they're not the best fucking band in town.