Thursday, March 29, 2012

Just Like Pagliacci Did.

Hey up cockers, it's Friday Roundup time!

This week I got organized and made a list of things I needed to include in the Roundup, so hopefully this week it won't just be links to blogs I've been reading while I'm supposed to be at work. Having said that, here's a link to Monique Hanley's blog, with a bunch of suggestions on how we can support women's racing. Monique is a bona fide legend in my eyes, and always has something interesting to say about cycling. Until I discovered her blog the other day I had no idea she was so well written, however. Check it out.

Brunswick Cycling Club are starting up their Sunday Skills Sessions at DISC again, but I think it's for one Sunday only, wedged as it is between national teams training for the World Champs and some pretty serious roof repairs. So you better get down there. More information here. This is how I got my start in the sport, and look where it's taken me!

And while we're on the topic of bicycle racing, road season is gradually rolling around. Both the Northern Combine and Footscray Cycling Club have released their 2012 fixtures. Some others may have too, but the Combine and Footscray are the two that I like to ride most of all. I'd also, at this point, like suggest it's about time you stopped wasting your time with bullshit 'Gentleman's Rides' and actually pin a number on. What the hell is a 'Gentleman's Ride' anyways? As far as I can see it's a bunch of folks who want to pretend they're in a Rapha video doing a team time trial in a glamorous location without permits, sanctions or results. If anyone can educate me further on that one, please leave a comment.

Apparently Tough Mudder is on this weekend. I can't think of a bigger load of bullshit. Even a 'Gentleman's Ride' seems less pretentious. This schtick is just more invented danger for upper-middle class white folks desperate to feel like they've achieved something great by doing an obstacle course on the weekend. One of the meatheads behind CrossFit training must've realized that there were thousands of folks out there who really, really wanted to do basic training with the armed forces, but didn't want to give up their regular life. So they invented this bullshit danger-without-a-cause for bogans with no commitment.

I've said this before, but I'll update it for you. If you want danger, why don't you head down Florida way wearing a hoodie. Go campaign for gay rights in Malaysia. Go to Spain and help kick off a general strike. But don't pretend you're a tough guy because you splashed through some mud while the St John of God volunteers watched on. It might be fun, sure, and I'm down with that. But I have about as much admiration for these Tough Mudder guys as I do for folks who refer to their bike rides as "epic".

Well, for someone who is now officially on school holidays, and who is down for every session of next weekend's Track World Champs (except for maybe Thursday afternoon, during which Sean The Man may pretend to be me in order to write a piece on Bike Tech At The Worlds), and who truly loves the twin gifts that Eastertime brings [Lindt Dark Chocolate Bunnies (vegan!) and Hot Cross Buns (often vegan!)], I'm sure in a ranty mood. So let me finish up with one more seasonal item, in order for us all to finish on a more pleasant note.

I grew up in Stawell, and was a fast runner, so there was a pretty solid expectation that I would run in the Stawell Easter Gift. I gave up running before I had the chance, but I still enjoyed heading down and watching the action. For years Leith and I were able to get in for free by telling the people on the gate who our parents were, but the longer we'd lived out of town the less that worked. So instead we started just jumping the fence. It's easy to do, and it seems that because no one has ever done it before, there is next to no security keeping an eye out. It's the easiest way to get something for free, other than entering all your vegetables as brown onions in the self-serve checkouts at Coles.

See you next week, delinquents.


Anonymous said...

The first month of the Footscray road season is only open to Footscray members! :( So we have to wait until May to enjoy their races.

Also the Northern Combine relies on volunteers to ensure the racing is run safely. Details on how to volunteer, and get a cheaper race entry fee, are her:

Death Race said...

Footscray is great for two things:

1.Learning to race in the gutter.

2. Being yelled at my old hardmen.